It has happened again.....

...The boys moved out last night. I thought it was stupid to move your life because someone gets sicker (especially and older person) but I knew that I don't always understand human emotions. So I did my best to keep it to myself. Well as it turns out, it was partially my fault. Well FUCK THAT. I am an awesome sister and I do everything I possibly can (and sometimes even things I can't/shouldn't)  for the people I love. I still blame myself, because that is my nature, but I won't (READ WILL FUCKING NOT) let them make me feel like shit. Not again.

The only thing that really irks me is that they had the audacity to say that we were "trying to hustle" them out of their next rent payment. They left with less than 24 hours notice, and while I exxagerrated the exact nature of the impact of them not paying us, it is still practical sense. But whatever, unlike every other time, we are ok this time. My dad is working and even at only part time he can cover what they would have been paying plus a little which is good. If we were the fucked up people they think we are, we could sue them for a month's rent, but we would NEVER do that, we tried to get only the next payment because when you move out suddenly people still have bills to pay.

We consistently *lose* money by helping people and letting them live here. But of course we are just money hungry and want whatever we can (obviously my threat to take their PS3 was a bit over the top, but I was really mad because my brother, my FUCKING brother, didn't care for a second that he was screwing us, or hurting us, or anything other than his stupid boyfriends' selfish needs).

But that just shows that he really didn't care about being a family, we were just a place to stay till they wanted to stay somewhere else. Just like everyone else. I know I am not letting anyone move in for a very long time. I can't go through this again, not for a while. Plus it is obvious that other that my dad, no one really wants to live with me anyway.

I am still a little mad, but I am not really hurting as much as the last few times. I think I am just numb to it all. Josh is happy, and that is still really important to me. And me and my dad are actually going to spend time together tonight. Plus Jeremy promised we will start doing more things together, and I am going to get out there and try to make friends somewhere. I dont know where, but I am going to try :).